"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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