apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
