i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
