plz talk dirty to me
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Randomize
