You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
