Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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