yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
