Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
