I can't breathe out the right side of my face
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Randomize
