I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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