The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
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