idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
