I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Randomize
