i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
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