did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
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