I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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