look no pants
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
