Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
