onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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