Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A

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(813): View more from Florida

Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.

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(718): View more from New York

you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".

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(719): View more from Colorado

dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it

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(801): View more from Utah

He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower

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