life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
