I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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