I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
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