I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
