my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
