I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
