why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
3pm strippers are depressing
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Randomize
