If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
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