I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
