That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
I need water and some morals
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
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