Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
