it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Randomize
