Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Randomize
