so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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