Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize
