the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
