Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
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