now i know why i became what i already was.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize
