FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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