its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize
