Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
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