so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
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