can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
Randomize
