I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
