Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
