I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
Randomize
