On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
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