Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
