the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
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