ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize