She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
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