found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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